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I'm currently rereading through Homestuck for the third time. I'm up to the part where Dirk is telling Jake about how things went between the "present" for Jake (around 2009 at that point in the story) and the future for Jake, which is Dirk's "present," because Dirk lives around 400 years in Jake's future.[1]
Here are just a few partial excerpts. ("TT" and "GT" are the online chat handles of Dirk and Jake, respectively.)
TT: Ever hear of Guy Fieri?
GT: No?
GT: I dont think so.
TT: You're fortunate then.
TT: He was an especially degenerate piece of filth.
TT: He used his connections and guile to wriggle into the spotlight, and then on to other positions of power.
...
GT: Was his personal magnetism really that overwhelming?
TT: Maybe overwhelming in the wrong direction, yeah.
TT: But it didn't happen overnight. It was a gradual decline in the integrity of the system that allowed it.
TT: Eventually the wheels came off and the political scene mirrored the absurdity of the media circus.
TT: By the time Presidents Jay and Dope were elected, western civilization had officially fucked itself over forever, and I think everyone knew it.
GT: Oh no.
GT: When does that happen?
TT: 2024. The last free election the world would ever see.
(Emphasis mine on that last line, there, because god damn.)
...
GT: Im not sure i follow. These are like clown presidents or such?
TT: Yes. They were a shitty rap duo from your time.
TT: But they ran a hell of a campaign. By then the juggalo party had gotten huge. While the numerous other candidates split the moderate vote, they retained a very energized and devoted base.
TT: You could say their party had a big tent.
...
TT: People were less prepared for a double juggalo presidency than they ever imagined.
TT: I'm not even going to get into all the horrifying details. Trust me, you just start to feel dirty reading about it.
...
TT: That was it. Everyone in the world watching it on TV just said, "Welp. Show's over. Civilization was pretty cool while it lasted."
Really, just replace "Guy Fieri" and "Jay and Dope" with "Donald Trump," and replace "shitty rap duo" with "shitty reality TV 'star,'" and replace "the juggalo party" with "MAGA." However, "clown president" is still rather apropos as an accurate description of Trump, though, if you merely remove the plural.
Sure, some specifics (which I left out of the above) are different, obviously, such as the fact that Trump hasn't directly caused the deaths of five billion humans (yet) and also doesn't have the backing of a trans-dimensional troll/fish alien empress[1] (that we know of, anyway), but aside from that... these particular, cherry-picked excerpts of Dirk Strider's description of the rise to power of Guy Fieri and the Insane Clown Posse in the early 2010s and 2020s in the fiction of Homestuck (this section of HS was written in the real world year of 2012) are eerily similar to that of Donald J. Trump, circa 2015-present.
¬_¬
[1] - And I'm sorry if none of that made sense, but my goal in this post isn't to explain Homestuck, in general, for the uninitiated. My goal in this post is, very simply, to dunk on Donald Trump yet again.
Here are just a few partial excerpts. ("TT" and "GT" are the online chat handles of Dirk and Jake, respectively.)
TT: Ever hear of Guy Fieri?
GT: No?
GT: I dont think so.
TT: You're fortunate then.
TT: He was an especially degenerate piece of filth.
TT: He used his connections and guile to wriggle into the spotlight, and then on to other positions of power.
...
GT: Was his personal magnetism really that overwhelming?
TT: Maybe overwhelming in the wrong direction, yeah.
TT: But it didn't happen overnight. It was a gradual decline in the integrity of the system that allowed it.
TT: Eventually the wheels came off and the political scene mirrored the absurdity of the media circus.
TT: By the time Presidents Jay and Dope were elected, western civilization had officially fucked itself over forever, and I think everyone knew it.
GT: Oh no.
GT: When does that happen?
TT: 2024. The last free election the world would ever see.
(Emphasis mine on that last line, there, because god damn.)
...
GT: Im not sure i follow. These are like clown presidents or such?
TT: Yes. They were a shitty rap duo from your time.
TT: But they ran a hell of a campaign. By then the juggalo party had gotten huge. While the numerous other candidates split the moderate vote, they retained a very energized and devoted base.
TT: You could say their party had a big tent.
...
TT: People were less prepared for a double juggalo presidency than they ever imagined.
TT: I'm not even going to get into all the horrifying details. Trust me, you just start to feel dirty reading about it.
...
TT: That was it. Everyone in the world watching it on TV just said, "Welp. Show's over. Civilization was pretty cool while it lasted."
Really, just replace "Guy Fieri" and "Jay and Dope" with "Donald Trump," and replace "shitty rap duo" with "shitty reality TV 'star,'" and replace "the juggalo party" with "MAGA." However, "clown president" is still rather apropos as an accurate description of Trump, though, if you merely remove the plural.
Sure, some specifics (which I left out of the above) are different, obviously, such as the fact that Trump hasn't directly caused the deaths of five billion humans (yet) and also doesn't have the backing of a trans-dimensional troll/fish alien empress[1] (that we know of, anyway), but aside from that... these particular, cherry-picked excerpts of Dirk Strider's description of the rise to power of Guy Fieri and the Insane Clown Posse in the early 2010s and 2020s in the fiction of Homestuck (this section of HS was written in the real world year of 2012) are eerily similar to that of Donald J. Trump, circa 2015-present.
¬_¬
[1] - And I'm sorry if none of that made sense, but my goal in this post isn't to explain Homestuck, in general, for the uninitiated. My goal in this post is, very simply, to dunk on Donald Trump yet again.
