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(The next post in this episodic "review" "series.")
To follow up on that thing from before.
Or, at least, I just finished watching the first episode anyway. While doing so, I took notes. Which I will copy/paste here (just as I figured I would end up doing, as stated in the notes themselves). This might become a thing with the rest of the episodes, too. Or it might not. We'll see, I guess.
Slightly edited copy/pasted notes starts here:
Captain N notes
Yeah, I'm going to be semi-facetiously nitpicking the shit outta this shit.
1x01 "Kevin in Videoland"
- Mother Brain apparently employs Winkies from Oz in her army.
- Who/what is the voice coming from the Power Glove/Infinity Gauntlet thing? And if that person/thing has powers like the ability to open "the Ultimate Warp Zone" into the real world, then why the hell isn't he/it the hero of Videoland, instead of Kevin Keene? Apparently, this is never addressed again in the entire series. Also, the voice from the Power Glove (that's what I'm going to call it) is that of the narrator, just to note.
- In the actual scene in the episode itself introducing real world Kevin, it uses proper Punch-Out!! music and sounds, rather than the more generic show theme remix and Mario sounds we get in the intro.
- Kevin, to be a supposed "game master," is actually doing incredibly shit against King Hippo in the second or two we see of him playing Punch-Out!!. Kevin's already two minutes into the three minute round, his life bar is almost completely gone whereas King Hippo's is still completely maxed out, he's lost more than half of his stamina hearts, he has scored zero points, and King Hippo is blocking everything Kevin throws at him. Why the fuck did the Power Glove pick this dude, again? Why didn't they grab this guy instead?
- Real life Duke appears to be a Labrador Retriever. Duke in the animated show, however, looks like a pit bull or whatever.
- No, really, what in the unholy fuck is that horrid-90s-CGI green humanoid figure that comes into?/out of? the TV when Kevin is pulled in? Is that supposed to be Kevin himself or something? Is that him "transforming" into a cartoon/video game character? You see it in the intro and also in this initial scene. And, in the actual scene, what the fuck is that screaming when Kevin gets pulled in? It's clearly not Kevin, because it's in addition to Kevin's own screams. And it's not Duke, either, because it doesn't sound like a dog at all. Unless that's Duke's "voice actor" trying (and failing) to sound like a dog? Fuck if I can tell. Well, in any case, that monster's gonna give me nightmares.
- Kevin is pulled into the TV. Duke's more like sure fuck it why not and actively jumps into the TV.
- The Power Glove originally creates the Ultimate Warp Zone high in the ceiling above it. Later, when Kevin and Duke actually come through, a new warp zone opens in the wall behind the main cast. MST3K Mantra. I'm sure I'll probably be saying that a lot while watching this.
- Captain N: The Game Master, like the Dungeons and Dragons cartoon, is one of the earliest examples of isekai fiction. (I mean, if one doesn't count "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" or "The Wonderful Wizard of Oz" and the like, I guess.)
- Right off the bat, they overtly sexualize Princess Lana (i.e. slow full-body pan from her feet up to her face), because of course they do. Several Tropes vs Women in Video Games videos talk about shit like this. Duke rolling his eyes at it is the only saving grace. (Pre-post EDIT that wasn't in the original notes I took) Speaking of which, as an aside, I see upon glancing at the Feminist Frequency Youtube page that there are actually a fair few of those Tropes videos that I somehow missed, so I might just be doing a third post about that to get the ones I didn't before. At some point. Won't be tonight. (/Pre-post EDIT)
- "YoU mEaN lIkE wArP zOnE fOuR iN SuPeR mArIo BrOs.?" Huh, okay, so they straight up explicitly mention Super Mario Bros. right there, but still, Mario himself (Nintendo's flagship character) never appears in the show.
- No explanation of why Kevin has the Power Pad and Zapper other than "The legend foretold of your coming to help restore freedom to our world. That's why it gave you that Super Power Pad and Zapper!" Is "the legend" the same entity as the Power Glove (or who/whatever voice was coming out of the Power Glove)? If "the legend" can bestow things like that on some random schlub it yanks through a warp zone, why can't it equip all (or even just some) of Lana's people with something similar? MST3K Mantra.
- Power Glove/Ultimate Warp Zone/"the legend" is like nope, fuck you kid, you're stuck here now.
- Aside from his sexist womanizing bullshit and blatantly trying to get into Lana's pants, I'm kind of on Simon's side here, at least as far as his initial opinion of Kevin goes.
- Oh god Kid Icarus and Mega Man... shut the fuck up for the love of god shut the fuck up. Am I really going to try watching this whole entire series? That said... Kid Icarus actually said a full sentence without the "-icus" verbal quirk. ("You were our only hope, but you let her down!") And Mega Man said a full sentence without using the world "mega." ("You get a low score for this game!"). Interesting. Maybe I'll make a thing out of noting other instances of when they manage to do that, if at all.
- Okay, so the Power Glove opening the Ultimate Warp Zone apparently drained the Palace of Power of its... uh... power. So, Mother Brain decides this gives her a "perfect opportunity" to "strike a fatal blow"... after an apparent seven year siege, as described in the opening. What the hell has she been doing all of this time up until now?
- King Hippo and Eggplant Wizard and Mother Brain... their whole dynamic... *sigh*... this is going to be a long rewatch. (Especially if I keep stopping every little bit to make these notes, which I'm gonna call now and say I'll just end up copy/pasting all this shit if I end up making a post about this, which I most assuredly will, because why would I be taking these notes in the first place, otherwise, duh? And I'm thinking more now that I might just make posts on an episode-by-episode basis, or at most two or three episodes per post, because if I make this many notes for each of the episodes, it would be one long-ass post if I just dumped it all into one post.)
- Basically, Mother Brain's "fatal blow" is... for King Hippo to go in and punch things and then kidnap Lana. You know, instead of killing Lana or whatever. Children's cartoon. MST3K Mantra. (Venger never would've settled for weaksauce shit like that, though.)
- Ugh. Mega Man himself avoided the "mega" thing, again, but then Simon goes and says it instead.
- There's some Castlevania music playing (Simon's Quest title theme) while Simon... walks down a hall and gets easily taken out by King Hippo.
- So King Hippo and Eggplant Wizard grab Lana and drag her back into her room... just a literal split second before Kevin walks up and knocks on the door. He absolutely would have seen them grabbing her. MST3K Mantra.
- At least Kevin isn't braindead enough to fall for King Hippo's terrible "Princess Lana" voice. I'll give him that much credit.
- King Hippo's awesome plan: throw Princess Lana, the person they were there to kidnap, at the guy there to save her... and then get immediately owned by that guy's dog.
- And then Eggplant Wizard immediately "out shoots" Kevin, Old West style, and captures him in a slow-moving banana projectile net thing. And, in the five seconds before Duke easily opens the banana, KH and EP manage to get away scot free with Lana (who apparently let them grab her again, off screen).
- Oh god, even when he's not doing the "-icus" thing, Kid Icarus still has a terrible New York accent. "We'll staht soiching immediately!"
- Oh fuck off entirely, Simon. "As the highest ranking officer, I shall give the orders. Mega Man shine my boots. Kid Icarus I could use a little trim." This, after he knew Lana had been kidnapped. And with that, what little patience I'd built up for Simon's bullshit is completely gone. Even as a kid watching this, I never fucking liked Simon. (Which sucked, because Simon's Quest was literally the first NES game I ever played, and Castlevania as a whole is one of my all-time favorite game series. This, despite Simon Belmont being depicted as a useless piece of dogshit in this cartoon.)
- And then, instead of getting down to business, Mega Man and Kid Icarus waste more time clowning on Simon. Princess Lana is still captured, you guys. Remember her? Then again, maybe they're just fully aware of how utterly incompetent Mother Brain and her bunch are, so they know Lana isn't in any real danger.
- Funny how Kevin just seems to intuitively know how to properly use the Power Pad. Also, he basically has The World from Stardust Crusaders as a super power. With a little more imaginative use of that, he could have ended this war and wiped out Mother Brain and her forces right from the start. But then, we wouldn't have three seasons of cartoon, I guess. Ah well.
- "No wonder Videoland's losing the war!" Yeah, no shit, Kevin.
- Just to note, there was never a place called "Metroid" in the games. The Metroids were creatures. "Metroid" as a planet was artistic license on the part of the show. Yeah, yeah, I get it, the video game world is named after the video game it's based on (except in the case of "KongoLand," so it's not actually consistent at all).
- Wait... for that matter, I don't recall ever seeing any actual Metroids in Captain N, either. The Internet tells me that they were only ever seen in Captain N concept art, not in the actual show, and that they maybe showed up a bit in the comics. Okay, so Mother Brain, the main villain of the first and third game, is there, but the protagonist of all of the games and the iconic enemies ofallmost(?) of the games are not there. Go figure. (Also, Mother Brain has literally the same voice as the talking plant ["FEED ME, SEYMOUR!"] from Little Shop of Horrors. Man, this cartoon was weird.)
- Oh wow, I'm not even halfway through the first episode yet... >_>;
- "Look, I've played this game a hundred times. THIS is the warp to Metroid." ...Kevin, there were no warp zones in Metroid. Also, again, "Metroid" wasn't a place in the games. (But then, this is coming from the so-called "Game Master" who was shocked to learn that Samus was a girl in the comic books, so... yeah, this tracks, actually.)
- Simon has a double-headed coin with his own face on it, because of course he does.
- "Ohhh wee ummm. Ohhhweee ummm." Yep, legally distinct Winkies.
- Simon's warp zone to Metroid doesn't lead to Metroid at all. Shock of shocks. Instead, it leads to KongoLand. Complete with a flashing neon sign that says "KongoLand." (But shouldn't the name of the world be "Donkey Kong," after the actual game?) Because Simon is a fucking moron, and everyone else is a fucking moron for following him without question (with the possible exception of Kevin and Duke [the dog probably the smartest of the bunch] given that they did question him).
- Wow, I forgot how fucking huge Donkey Kong is in this. More like actual King Kong, instead of the "roughly proportionate to a normal gorilla compared to Mario" size he was/is in the games.
- Donkey Kong pauses to make sure his towel is in place (he was taking a bath, complete with shower cap, when Captain N and bunch dropped in on him) before starting to chase them, because nobody wants to see Donkey Kong's donkey kong in a children's cartoon. Then again, just before that, Kevin and the rest are basically given a faceful of full, uncovered Donkey Crotch right there in the tub, and... there fortunately wasn't anything of note to see... so... *shrug*
- Simon is basically the equivalent to Eric from the Dungeons and Dragons cartoon, except way more asinine and way more incompetent.
- Seriously, just about every Tropes vs Women in Video Games video probably could be applied to Princess Lana. *sigh*
- "Look, I've played Donkey Kong enough times to know what I'm doing, trust me," says Kevin, while climbing a volcano, to reach a warp zone, about a game in which there were no volcanos or warp zones. MST3K Mantra.
- Kevin uses ZA WARUDO to get the gang onto boulders shooting out of the volcano (you know, just like that bit that totally happens in Donkey Kong) and... the boulders fly them all the way from KongoLand to Metroid, apparently. Okay. MST3K Mantra. Maybe they flew the boulders into the warp zone or something? MST3K Mantra.
- Simon is such an egotistical idiot whose only apparent goal is to get his dick wet with Lana, but at least his idiocy causes him to eat shit more often than not, so that's cool, I guess.
- Hmm, I think that was a bit of Mega Man music while Mega Man was giving Kevin a boost up to Lana's prison cell. It's Mega Man-ish, anyway, though I don't immediately recognize it. I was never all that big into Mega Man, in general, so the music isn't as familiar to me as that of other games. Similarly, outside of the main theme and maybe the first level music, I probably won't catch any of the Kid Icarus music either, unless it's playing during an obviously Kid Icarus-centered scene, and even then only maybe.
- So... that creature that was just there in the room with Lana was kind of pointless. It's there when she first gets sucked into the prison cell by Mother Brain, she kind of looks at it in shock for a bit then turns to the window and ignores it utterly. Then, later, Kevin crashes through the ceiling, lands on it, it blips out of existence, and... that's it. That was the entirety of that monster's role in the plot of this episode. I guess it was just a guard or something?
- Let's see... Body Language & The Male Gaze... Strategic Butt Coverings... Damsel in Distress... Women as Reward... those are at least some of the Tropes vs Women in Video Games topics that could be applied to Lana, and this is all still just the first episode.
- Ah, right, Kevin (in)convenietly has an energy bar (right there on the top of the Power Pad) that he can use up, which of course he did use up right as they get to Mother Brain, (in)conveniently meaning he can't just blast Mother Brain and win the war in the first episode. (Also, Kevin seems to have forgotten that energy beams don't work on Mother Brain and that you have to use missiles [which he doesn't have] to crack open the glass case surrounding her to damage her at all. But then, the Zapper is a mystical artifact given to him by "the legend," so maybe it would've actually worked, I dunno.)
- Oh... right... Simon's whip is apparently sentient and can act of its own volition in this. Forgot about that, too. Man, that would've been kind of useful in the actual Castlevania games. And also pretty broken and OP.
- And then Kid Icarus defeats Mother Brain with a single arrow. Which just hits a switch that makes her start spinning really fast. Why does Mother Brain have a switch like that, and why does she keep it right there next to her? Maybe I don't really wanna know the answer to that. ¬_¬ So, anyway "it's too dangerous to finish her off," and so... everyone flees to preserve the status quo, as per any 80s cartoon. (Aside from Dungeons and Dragons, where they killed the shit out of Venger several times over the course of the series.)
- Lana knows what Simon's all about. She, at least, isn't going to put up with his shit. Much.
- Kevin was totally going to abandon them and go back to the real world, but his mother's nagging voice coming through the warp zone is all it takes to convince him to stay in Videoland. Our hero, everyone.
- And Lana kisses him for it. Simon gasps in shock. And Kevin shoots the camera guy for no reason. End credits.
- Huh... I'm pretty sure that Mega Man never once uses the word "mega" in this episode, outside of the "MEGA HI!!!!1" in the intro. Kid Icarus definitely said a bunch of "-icus" and "maximus" shit, though.
- So, that was the first episode (for some reason, I can only very rarely type the word "episode" successfully on the first try) of Captain N: The Game Master. Dunno how long I'll be able to keep this up. Ain't gonna watch any more of it today, anyway, that's for sure.
To follow up on that thing from before.
Or, at least, I just finished watching the first episode anyway. While doing so, I took notes. Which I will copy/paste here (just as I figured I would end up doing, as stated in the notes themselves). This might become a thing with the rest of the episodes, too. Or it might not. We'll see, I guess.
Slightly edited copy/pasted notes starts here:
Captain N notes
Yeah, I'm going to be semi-facetiously nitpicking the shit outta this shit.
1x01 "Kevin in Videoland"
- Mother Brain apparently employs Winkies from Oz in her army.
- Who/what is the voice coming from the Power Glove/Infinity Gauntlet thing? And if that person/thing has powers like the ability to open "the Ultimate Warp Zone" into the real world, then why the hell isn't he/it the hero of Videoland, instead of Kevin Keene? Apparently, this is never addressed again in the entire series. Also, the voice from the Power Glove (that's what I'm going to call it) is that of the narrator, just to note.
- In the actual scene in the episode itself introducing real world Kevin, it uses proper Punch-Out!! music and sounds, rather than the more generic show theme remix and Mario sounds we get in the intro.
- Kevin, to be a supposed "game master," is actually doing incredibly shit against King Hippo in the second or two we see of him playing Punch-Out!!. Kevin's already two minutes into the three minute round, his life bar is almost completely gone whereas King Hippo's is still completely maxed out, he's lost more than half of his stamina hearts, he has scored zero points, and King Hippo is blocking everything Kevin throws at him. Why the fuck did the Power Glove pick this dude, again? Why didn't they grab this guy instead?
- Real life Duke appears to be a Labrador Retriever. Duke in the animated show, however, looks like a pit bull or whatever.
- No, really, what in the unholy fuck is that horrid-90s-CGI green humanoid figure that comes into?/out of? the TV when Kevin is pulled in? Is that supposed to be Kevin himself or something? Is that him "transforming" into a cartoon/video game character? You see it in the intro and also in this initial scene. And, in the actual scene, what the fuck is that screaming when Kevin gets pulled in? It's clearly not Kevin, because it's in addition to Kevin's own screams. And it's not Duke, either, because it doesn't sound like a dog at all. Unless that's Duke's "voice actor" trying (and failing) to sound like a dog? Fuck if I can tell. Well, in any case, that monster's gonna give me nightmares.
- Kevin is pulled into the TV. Duke's more like sure fuck it why not and actively jumps into the TV.
- The Power Glove originally creates the Ultimate Warp Zone high in the ceiling above it. Later, when Kevin and Duke actually come through, a new warp zone opens in the wall behind the main cast. MST3K Mantra. I'm sure I'll probably be saying that a lot while watching this.
- Captain N: The Game Master, like the Dungeons and Dragons cartoon, is one of the earliest examples of isekai fiction. (I mean, if one doesn't count "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" or "The Wonderful Wizard of Oz" and the like, I guess.)
- Right off the bat, they overtly sexualize Princess Lana (i.e. slow full-body pan from her feet up to her face), because of course they do. Several Tropes vs Women in Video Games videos talk about shit like this. Duke rolling his eyes at it is the only saving grace. (Pre-post EDIT that wasn't in the original notes I took) Speaking of which, as an aside, I see upon glancing at the Feminist Frequency Youtube page that there are actually a fair few of those Tropes videos that I somehow missed, so I might just be doing a third post about that to get the ones I didn't before. At some point. Won't be tonight. (/Pre-post EDIT)
- "YoU mEaN lIkE wArP zOnE fOuR iN SuPeR mArIo BrOs.?" Huh, okay, so they straight up explicitly mention Super Mario Bros. right there, but still, Mario himself (Nintendo's flagship character) never appears in the show.
- No explanation of why Kevin has the Power Pad and Zapper other than "The legend foretold of your coming to help restore freedom to our world. That's why it gave you that Super Power Pad and Zapper!" Is "the legend" the same entity as the Power Glove (or who/whatever voice was coming out of the Power Glove)? If "the legend" can bestow things like that on some random schlub it yanks through a warp zone, why can't it equip all (or even just some) of Lana's people with something similar? MST3K Mantra.
- Power Glove/Ultimate Warp Zone/"the legend" is like nope, fuck you kid, you're stuck here now.
- Aside from his sexist womanizing bullshit and blatantly trying to get into Lana's pants, I'm kind of on Simon's side here, at least as far as his initial opinion of Kevin goes.
- Oh god Kid Icarus and Mega Man... shut the fuck up for the love of god shut the fuck up. Am I really going to try watching this whole entire series? That said... Kid Icarus actually said a full sentence without the "-icus" verbal quirk. ("You were our only hope, but you let her down!") And Mega Man said a full sentence without using the world "mega." ("You get a low score for this game!"). Interesting. Maybe I'll make a thing out of noting other instances of when they manage to do that, if at all.
- Okay, so the Power Glove opening the Ultimate Warp Zone apparently drained the Palace of Power of its... uh... power. So, Mother Brain decides this gives her a "perfect opportunity" to "strike a fatal blow"... after an apparent seven year siege, as described in the opening. What the hell has she been doing all of this time up until now?
- King Hippo and Eggplant Wizard and Mother Brain... their whole dynamic... *sigh*... this is going to be a long rewatch. (Especially if I keep stopping every little bit to make these notes, which I'm gonna call now and say I'll just end up copy/pasting all this shit if I end up making a post about this, which I most assuredly will, because why would I be taking these notes in the first place, otherwise, duh? And I'm thinking more now that I might just make posts on an episode-by-episode basis, or at most two or three episodes per post, because if I make this many notes for each of the episodes, it would be one long-ass post if I just dumped it all into one post.)
- Basically, Mother Brain's "fatal blow" is... for King Hippo to go in and punch things and then kidnap Lana. You know, instead of killing Lana or whatever. Children's cartoon. MST3K Mantra. (Venger never would've settled for weaksauce shit like that, though.)
- Ugh. Mega Man himself avoided the "mega" thing, again, but then Simon goes and says it instead.
- There's some Castlevania music playing (Simon's Quest title theme) while Simon... walks down a hall and gets easily taken out by King Hippo.
- So King Hippo and Eggplant Wizard grab Lana and drag her back into her room... just a literal split second before Kevin walks up and knocks on the door. He absolutely would have seen them grabbing her. MST3K Mantra.
- At least Kevin isn't braindead enough to fall for King Hippo's terrible "Princess Lana" voice. I'll give him that much credit.
- King Hippo's awesome plan: throw Princess Lana, the person they were there to kidnap, at the guy there to save her... and then get immediately owned by that guy's dog.
- And then Eggplant Wizard immediately "out shoots" Kevin, Old West style, and captures him in a slow-moving banana projectile net thing. And, in the five seconds before Duke easily opens the banana, KH and EP manage to get away scot free with Lana (who apparently let them grab her again, off screen).
- Oh god, even when he's not doing the "-icus" thing, Kid Icarus still has a terrible New York accent. "We'll staht soiching immediately!"
- Oh fuck off entirely, Simon. "As the highest ranking officer, I shall give the orders. Mega Man shine my boots. Kid Icarus I could use a little trim." This, after he knew Lana had been kidnapped. And with that, what little patience I'd built up for Simon's bullshit is completely gone. Even as a kid watching this, I never fucking liked Simon. (Which sucked, because Simon's Quest was literally the first NES game I ever played, and Castlevania as a whole is one of my all-time favorite game series. This, despite Simon Belmont being depicted as a useless piece of dogshit in this cartoon.)
- And then, instead of getting down to business, Mega Man and Kid Icarus waste more time clowning on Simon. Princess Lana is still captured, you guys. Remember her? Then again, maybe they're just fully aware of how utterly incompetent Mother Brain and her bunch are, so they know Lana isn't in any real danger.
- Funny how Kevin just seems to intuitively know how to properly use the Power Pad. Also, he basically has The World from Stardust Crusaders as a super power. With a little more imaginative use of that, he could have ended this war and wiped out Mother Brain and her forces right from the start. But then, we wouldn't have three seasons of cartoon, I guess. Ah well.
- "No wonder Videoland's losing the war!" Yeah, no shit, Kevin.
- Just to note, there was never a place called "Metroid" in the games. The Metroids were creatures. "Metroid" as a planet was artistic license on the part of the show. Yeah, yeah, I get it, the video game world is named after the video game it's based on (except in the case of "KongoLand," so it's not actually consistent at all).
- Wait... for that matter, I don't recall ever seeing any actual Metroids in Captain N, either. The Internet tells me that they were only ever seen in Captain N concept art, not in the actual show, and that they maybe showed up a bit in the comics. Okay, so Mother Brain, the main villain of the first and third game, is there, but the protagonist of all of the games and the iconic enemies of
- Oh wow, I'm not even halfway through the first episode yet... >_>;
- "Look, I've played this game a hundred times. THIS is the warp to Metroid." ...Kevin, there were no warp zones in Metroid. Also, again, "Metroid" wasn't a place in the games. (But then, this is coming from the so-called "Game Master" who was shocked to learn that Samus was a girl in the comic books, so... yeah, this tracks, actually.)
- Simon has a double-headed coin with his own face on it, because of course he does.
- "Ohhh wee ummm. Ohhhweee ummm." Yep, legally distinct Winkies.
- Simon's warp zone to Metroid doesn't lead to Metroid at all. Shock of shocks. Instead, it leads to KongoLand. Complete with a flashing neon sign that says "KongoLand." (But shouldn't the name of the world be "Donkey Kong," after the actual game?) Because Simon is a fucking moron, and everyone else is a fucking moron for following him without question (with the possible exception of Kevin and Duke [the dog probably the smartest of the bunch] given that they did question him).
- Wow, I forgot how fucking huge Donkey Kong is in this. More like actual King Kong, instead of the "roughly proportionate to a normal gorilla compared to Mario" size he was/is in the games.
- Donkey Kong pauses to make sure his towel is in place (he was taking a bath, complete with shower cap, when Captain N and bunch dropped in on him) before starting to chase them, because nobody wants to see Donkey Kong's donkey kong in a children's cartoon. Then again, just before that, Kevin and the rest are basically given a faceful of full, uncovered Donkey Crotch right there in the tub, and... there fortunately wasn't anything of note to see... so... *shrug*
- Simon is basically the equivalent to Eric from the Dungeons and Dragons cartoon, except way more asinine and way more incompetent.
- Seriously, just about every Tropes vs Women in Video Games video probably could be applied to Princess Lana. *sigh*
- "Look, I've played Donkey Kong enough times to know what I'm doing, trust me," says Kevin, while climbing a volcano, to reach a warp zone, about a game in which there were no volcanos or warp zones. MST3K Mantra.
- Kevin uses ZA WARUDO to get the gang onto boulders shooting out of the volcano (you know, just like that bit that totally happens in Donkey Kong) and... the boulders fly them all the way from KongoLand to Metroid, apparently. Okay. MST3K Mantra. Maybe they flew the boulders into the warp zone or something? MST3K Mantra.
- Simon is such an egotistical idiot whose only apparent goal is to get his dick wet with Lana, but at least his idiocy causes him to eat shit more often than not, so that's cool, I guess.
- Hmm, I think that was a bit of Mega Man music while Mega Man was giving Kevin a boost up to Lana's prison cell. It's Mega Man-ish, anyway, though I don't immediately recognize it. I was never all that big into Mega Man, in general, so the music isn't as familiar to me as that of other games. Similarly, outside of the main theme and maybe the first level music, I probably won't catch any of the Kid Icarus music either, unless it's playing during an obviously Kid Icarus-centered scene, and even then only maybe.
- So... that creature that was just there in the room with Lana was kind of pointless. It's there when she first gets sucked into the prison cell by Mother Brain, she kind of looks at it in shock for a bit then turns to the window and ignores it utterly. Then, later, Kevin crashes through the ceiling, lands on it, it blips out of existence, and... that's it. That was the entirety of that monster's role in the plot of this episode. I guess it was just a guard or something?
- Let's see... Body Language & The Male Gaze... Strategic Butt Coverings... Damsel in Distress... Women as Reward... those are at least some of the Tropes vs Women in Video Games topics that could be applied to Lana, and this is all still just the first episode.
- Ah, right, Kevin (in)convenietly has an energy bar (right there on the top of the Power Pad) that he can use up, which of course he did use up right as they get to Mother Brain, (in)conveniently meaning he can't just blast Mother Brain and win the war in the first episode. (Also, Kevin seems to have forgotten that energy beams don't work on Mother Brain and that you have to use missiles [which he doesn't have] to crack open the glass case surrounding her to damage her at all. But then, the Zapper is a mystical artifact given to him by "the legend," so maybe it would've actually worked, I dunno.)
- Oh... right... Simon's whip is apparently sentient and can act of its own volition in this. Forgot about that, too. Man, that would've been kind of useful in the actual Castlevania games. And also pretty broken and OP.
- And then Kid Icarus defeats Mother Brain with a single arrow. Which just hits a switch that makes her start spinning really fast. Why does Mother Brain have a switch like that, and why does she keep it right there next to her? Maybe I don't really wanna know the answer to that. ¬_¬ So, anyway "it's too dangerous to finish her off," and so... everyone flees to preserve the status quo, as per any 80s cartoon. (Aside from Dungeons and Dragons, where they killed the shit out of Venger several times over the course of the series.)
- Lana knows what Simon's all about. She, at least, isn't going to put up with his shit. Much.
- Kevin was totally going to abandon them and go back to the real world, but his mother's nagging voice coming through the warp zone is all it takes to convince him to stay in Videoland. Our hero, everyone.
- And Lana kisses him for it. Simon gasps in shock. And Kevin shoots the camera guy for no reason. End credits.
- Huh... I'm pretty sure that Mega Man never once uses the word "mega" in this episode, outside of the "MEGA HI!!!!1" in the intro. Kid Icarus definitely said a bunch of "-icus" and "maximus" shit, though.
- So, that was the first episode (for some reason, I can only very rarely type the word "episode" successfully on the first try) of Captain N: The Game Master. Dunno how long I'll be able to keep this up. Ain't gonna watch any more of it today, anyway, that's for sure.
